She and I share a strong bond and can predict each other’s reactions quite accurately. Just like my sister, she gets me completely. We consult and validate each other’s decisions and thought process. 

But we are both worrywarts. We think, think and overthink. Some people just can’t ever seem to quiet the constant barrage of thoughts — and we are that some people. Life being life sends over our share of grey clouds from time to time. While we go through the ups and downs in life, we both overanalyse most situations. We excel at catastrophic predictions and end up inspecting every cell in what lays ahead of us through a microscope. Costing our peace of mind. What we both dread is what we call the “wait”. Time just stops moving during the wait. We both know very well that our disturbed and overthinking mind isn’t going to change the outcome. A joke of two here and there helps. But the mind continues to be in a state of turbulence. The wait. 

Two things that has helped me through my journey, lessons of which I share with her everyday. 

1. Two encounters I had during the month of August. Two brave and determined ladies. Each strong willed and wonderfully fierce. Mother figures. I was drawn to both.

– One of them spoke to me the morning after I had spent a restless night waiting. She helped calm my anxiety using reason. Her words conveyed strength. With ease she used the term – Attachment with detachment. I’d heard that before but never from a mother. I saw a lot of me in her. Only more fiercer. Life’s experience showed. I knew that very instance I’d gained a new role model.

– The second experience was a few weeks later. An unexpected strong connection. This mother from a different generation was über cool. Her mind was open and her thinking fresh. She was abundantly clear she does not look for validation from a society that will constantly tell you to be something else. I knew in her I’d gained a friend. 

2. A whatsapp forward message from this morning about the Hindu God Shiva’s vehicle –  “Nandi is a symbolism of eternal waiting, because waiting is considered the greatest virtue in Indian culture. One who knows how to simply sit and wait is naturally meditative. Nandi is not expecting Shiva to come out tomorrow. He is not anticipating or expecting anything. He is just waiting. He will wait forever. That quality is the essence of receptivity.”

Learning from these mothers – because with attachment comes a very strong urge to control the circumstances, we are slowly practicing attached detachment of things we know we cannot control. 

“Remain in the world, act in the world, do whatsoever is needful, and yet remain transcendental, aloof, detached, a lotus flower in the pond.”  – Osho, The Secret of Secrets

As for the Nandi, we swear to try each day to listen to the larger dimensions of existence and not make waiting such a painful experience. 

“Waiting is much easier than, having nothing to wait for…” – Tatai

This post is dedicated to my soul friend and the two ‘epitome of strength’ I’ve recently been awestruck of.